- Hello, this is Priviet Russiya
Russia international station where you can see the
best content that show worst things in your country
intersperse with hero Putin boar hunting
Season 4 of Juice Rap News commence imminently
everybody excite. suspense killing me
Expect to see clever rappings on internet screen
but wait... news arrive from Australian scene...
- How ya goin' Ken Oathcarn with a report from Melbourne
where everyone's asking the same sort of question
"Where the bloody hell's Rap News? gimme an answer!"
people in the street have exploded with genuine anger
G'day mate, what do you think of this strange delay?
- it's Gay and Lame, I've waited for ages, hey
they've betrayed us who pay nothing for Rap News...
I'll watch PewdiePie instead: he's easier to fap to
- Hold up, wait a minute, what the frick's going on now?
It's been three months with no episode, how long you expect me to hold out
This whole show sold out, I expose the vultures
trynna halt the facts I rap about UFO disclosure
I explode the whole scene of satanic ritual paedophilia
whether in the British parliament or MK Ultra videos from Sia
see ah: Juice Rap News are some truly wack dudes indeed
I knew this was a huge conspiracy to silence Terrence Moonseed
- You freak! So, Rap News is finally dead
We aligned Chris Kyle Sniper sights on their head
What's wrong, you neckbeard otaku in your bedrooms?
There's always the Mainstream news to connect to
- That's correct, too, MSMBS with headlies tonight
Brave Israelis kill Palestinian journalists in a fight
In Paris, terrorists kill brave cartoon artists.
Up next: how I personally fought Iraqis
- Well, viewers, there seems to be a mysterious pattern then
What's happened to the show that says History is Happening?
I'm about to find out by leaving my desk to obtain this
first ever interview with the show's co-creators
- Giordano, Hugo!
- Oh! Hi Robert. - Hey, Robert.
- What's going on, I thought we had a February target?
where's the next season? People are waiting for it
- Yeah... to be honest we've had a few unexpected problems
We've got this special announcement to make:
- We're very sorry to all the people out there expecting
the commencing of the next season in early twenty fifteen
- We were all set to go... we had everything ready
- The camera was checked, we'd polished the news desk...
filled the mugs, Turned on the mics on the set...
- our browsers were open, our pens were eager
there were enough insane stories for at least 10 seasons
- But then all of a sudden it seemed that
our funding for the whole Season had, err... disappeared.
- Disappeared?! How? - Uh, well it's a long story...
- But we've got things in hand now, so don't worry!
- We're happy to announce that we're AWOL no more
and we'll be able to produce the first half of Season 4!
- So expect the next 5 episodes to launch
very shortly... And wait til you see what's in store...
[INAUDIBLE]
...and so much more!
- That's great, but what about the second half of Season 4?
- We may need the help of our loyal audience at that junction
- that's right: we might be launching a campaign of crowdfunding
to ensure that the rest of the Season gets out then.
- And we'll be back with another announcement
in the middle of the season to let everyone know.
- I'm relieved to hear this news! OK, let's prep the show...
- Where's the damn episode??
- General, we were just explaining the delays in...
- Lazing? I knew it! You slackers need some motivation?
Now get writing, at speed! Foster, get in front of the damn screens
Shoot that scene! - Did someone say VACCINES?
You two!! Where are these shows then? Nibiru's approaching!
- Terrence! we promise we're not far from season open
- More lies from these devious spokesmen!
Like hearing global warming warnings when I'm snowed in like a scene from Frozen
- Chill out, Barbie! - Did someone say barbie?
I got a fresh batch of calamari for the launch party
I can grill it... hey, here's Ivan... Good'day - Is it?
I come to check... why next episode not finished?
- Hey...Who's that? ... a bloody immigrant
- Hello, you dirty kufs...
Allahu Akbar, innit!
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